Do You Feel...

Even if it has not seemed that way in all my posts, these past two months have been an absolute roller-coaster for me. I've done more learning and growing than I could've imagined in such a short time. One of the most important things that've been reemphasized to me is how much I thrive off having a community.

When I first arrive in a city, I get an overwhelming sense of lostness because I am completely alone and expected to prepare a cast's stay in just a few weeks. This feeling of panic stays with me until I start to find a community. In Globe, AZ it was my host parents and their church. In Eureka, CA it was my host parents, two host sisters, host brother and all their family friends. Having those people while I was setting up was absolutely one of the keys to making the cities successful. Once the cast arrives, everything comes together when I see how they connect with the community I've made in the city. And then when it is time to leave, it is a little heart-wrenching because I have to leave this community I've discovered, and maybe forever. This past week, I also had to say good-bye to Cast B because I had to leave them to start working for Cast C now.


At home, having a community is so incredibly important to me. Nothing brings me more joy than to see people I love connecting with each. It makes me feel alive and I can't imagine life without those people that are willing to throw down all their pride because they aren't afraid to show that they need each other. In Eureka, once the cast arrived, we had Jeremiah from WI, Cassidy from CO, Jules from Uganda, Lucas from Belgium and Johan from Sweden be hosted with my and Whitney's host family. It made me so happy to see how well everyone got along. At home, it brings me huge joy to look around at a group of friends and see everyone enjoying a beer and laughing about something that happened that day.

Right now, I'm in the Baltimore/D.C. area and I have that initial feeling of lostness. The area is so big that I'm feeling I will never find that sense of community for my own personal well-being and for the cast to have a successful stay. Deep down, I know that this feeling will eventually change, but until then, it's kind of scary. It's times like this when I really long for someone to sit on the couch with and talk about the most important thing in their life or absolutely nothing at all, or even just a familiar face and hug from someone at home. It's very hard and I know I'm becoming "stronger" but man I can't wait until this part is over!